Dr Affie Adagio Life Coach, Family Therapist, Marriage Celebrant, Trainer

specialising in dependencies: compulsions and recovery

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Fear of rejection

Filed under: Life Strategies — Affie Adagio at 10:31 pm on Thursday, February 22, 2007

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shadowed self portrait-detail, photo by Melvin Piro, Italy, self love We pretend to be strong and yet fear of rejection can keep us apart. So many people recoil when they face a criticism. This can be because as a child their parents and or teachers impacted on them in a negative way, whether real or perceived the damage was done. As an adult they are left with scars from those experiences which affect their relationships badly. Others behave in the opposite way - they enjoy the challenge when they are rejected and keeping coming back. Both reactions can be perceived as attractive or unattractive depending on how your needs are met. Nevertheless, we can choose to deal with rejection in a way that makes our lives fulfilled or doomed, it’s all a choice.

Alison had been screaming at her daughter Suzie
for at least half an hour and it felt no better
Suzie quietly got up and said to her mother
that as she was middle aged she chose not to
feel this distress anymore, so she was leaving
Alison screamed out “stay and fight you coward”
and Suzie replied “yes I am a coward and am going”
leaving her mother with her own dysfunctional state
which meant that Alison had to take responsibility
for the insane behaviour she had shown because
there was no one there to blame anything on

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1 Comment »

Comment by Vickie Turley

February 24, 2007 @ 3:26 am

Yes, fear of rejection is so strong. It shapes many people and causes them to be unfulfilled adults.

If we could learn to face the fear “head-on,” we could possibly begin to deal with it. If we hide from it or pretend it’s not there, we will never get past it.

Vickie Turley

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